I've made my mistakes

[Sheldon Martin]

With all due respect

Aren't you going to reciprocate?

Do I always have to talk sense into people?

TAGS || Dr Sofia Austin

[attr="class","nthlftsybdytxt1"]JJ had already headed home. Martin had dropped him off but come back to the hospital to tie up paperwork and stuff like that. There wasn't much he could do in terms of keeping himself together. He stared down at the death certificate paperwork and felt like collapsing on the floor. Martin had to be in for shift again tomorrow, enough of a distraction maybe? Yeah there was no distraction for this. Losing loved ones was never easy.

He came down the hall to go talk to Sofia. He knew that she was getting off soon as he tapped on her office door. "Hey" he called lightly in the door to her office. He needed to talk to someone. He knew he needed to be the strong one to hold his children together. But what was he supposed to do? Martin was used to being able to get through anything.

Though he wasn't sure he was going to be able to get through this alone, and he wasn't sure who else to turn to for advice. Even that of a friend. He wasn't sure how much Sofia knew about his wife's car accident and how much she didn't know. The last time he had seen Kristina was just before she left for the Carolina's. He'd had to work, she got a cab home and he blamed himself for not going to get her. Maybe she would still be alive. Yes, this was his fault and he wasn't going to let anyone tell him otherwise.

NOTES: NOTES HERE

BOBBI

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[Dr Sofia Austin]

Sofia had heard the news about Martin’s wife, it was awful that things could change like that in an instant. She herself was still getting used to the idea that her family was back in Chicago, Isaac was back alive and well and ever since that day in the hospital her head had been a mess. Work was the only thing that provided her with a sense of purpose and focus. She had dreamed that he would come back safe but now he had she had twenty years worth of feelings stuck inside her and no outlet for that because if she said anything, she might sound ungrateful which was far from the truth.

She had come to the conclusion that day she had seen more of her paperwork than actual people so far. It was why she was pleased to hear the tap and voice at the door as she looked up with a smile. Sofia soon turned her smile into something a little less pleased as really she had never expected Martin to be there. “Hey.” She said as she got up from behind her desk, she dropped a few envelopes into a tray to be posted out that she knew would be picked up later as she moved toward him.

Sofia knew little about the circumstances surrounding Kristina’s car accident, just that there had been one. The prognosis was pretty bad and now the worst thing she could imagine was happening to a friend as she waved him in before she went to hug him. “Martin I’m so sorry to hear about Kristina.” She said quietly deciding to state the obvious first. She wished that the hospital could save everyone and good people that lost their lives were the ones that hurt the most.

“How are you doing?” She asked knowing it was a silly question but then it was one of those obvious answers in life that the question was simply asked anyway. “Is there anything I can do?” It was good to be useful and to try and help in whatever way she could do. To lose a wife so young was difficult but so suddenly too it was a tragedy. Sometimes being a doctor was the worst thing in the world when you could see someone else hurting because there was nothing to be done.

Sheldon Martin,

[Sheldon Martin]

With all due respect

Aren't you going to reciprocate?

Do I always have to talk sense into people?

TAGS || Dr Sofia Austin

[attr="class","nthlftsybdytxt1"]Martin entered into the room but didn't see her moving towards him. Not until she was within almost arms reach did he even realize she had gotten up from the desk. Feeling arms around him in a hug that didn't belong to one his children is when he lost whatever composure he had. Tears stung at his face. When the kids were around he did his best to keep them from seeing how much he hurt. Not that he expected them to think that he didn't care about Kristina but what good would him breaking down in front of them do for them?

"You don't want the honest answer" he replied swallowing the lump in his throat. He put an arm around her and hugged his friend close. "Don't let me think about it" that was almost asking for the impossible, but it hurt so bad he didn't know what else TO do.

NOTES: Short but im not used to him being like this

BOBBI

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[Dr Sofia Austin]

Sofia nodded when he spoke about giving her the honest answer and she saw the tears on his face, she wished there was something more she could do. Anything that could bring her back to him and despite all the medical advances in the world, there were the occasions where nothing could be done and this she hated more than anything else. “I’m not your kids, I’m your friend so honest is the only way to be.” She said not wanting to push him about it but in being his friend she knew what he was like. The children would never see him like that and in that she did so honest was the only way.

Not to let him think about it? Was that even possible she wondered though she would do her best to try at least. “Have you eaten today?” She asked as she pulled away a little and motioned to her desk. “If not I’ve got it, and get ready for the diet of a doctor here. Chocolate, crisps, granola bars, coffee in sachets and energy drinks by the bucket load.” It was the only thing she could think of to distract him with, food made people happy or at least show her a bar of chocolate and she was anyone’s.

“Or I can order something here, cafeteria food is okay but just stay away from the blandly coloured things.” She rattled off trying to think of anything that was a distraction, Sofia had been meaning to go around and see Martin and Kristina but with the accident and now, she hardly knew what to her herself in life than unload that onto someone who had just lost their wife.

Sheldon Martin,

[Sheldon Martin]

With all due respect

Aren't you going to reciprocate?

Do I always have to talk sense into people?

TAGS || Dr Sofia Austin

[attr="class","nthlftsybdytxt1"]Martin just nodded. "I'm lost. I'm angry. I want to watch the drunk driver who hit her burn." Martin wasn't a hothead and him wishing death on anyone was... not like him at all. He just hugged Sofia not really sure what else to do. When she pulled back he let her move to the desk.

"You don't want that answer either" He'd had a whale of a day trying to keep Vanessa from doing stupid things. Then he'd gotten the call from the hospital. Now he didn't feel hungry. "You know most doctor's don't use chocolate as a caffeine source" he mentioned. Then again he knew that chocolate was a weakness of hers. He'd discovered that on accident.

Truth be told Martin wanted to get out of the hospital. "I was just going to go home and..." and do what Martin stare at the stove? Not that Martin didn't cook, it was just what Kristina enjoyed. So no he was probably going to home and put a frozen dinner in the microwave or get carry out.

"You alright?" he was just checking on her as he came up beside her. Reaching in her desk drawer he picked a piece of chocolate up and set it on her desk. "You haven't eaten either have you?" he questioned but then kept his distance. Okay so he was sometimes a pain in the butt and a bit of a smart ass.

NOTES: NOTES HERE

BOBBI

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[Dr Sofia Austin]

It was the moment he said he wanted to watch the drink driver who hit Kristina burn she knew that it was far from the Martin she knew talking. The man was calm and collected and a hot head wishing death on people, no that was unlike him. “See being honest it better but I know you and that last part, that’s not you at all.” She said not pushing it too much but then if it was one of her family then she would have said the exact same thing. It was only natural to want that though she knew it would change nothing.

Sofia gave him a look when he said she would not want the answer to her food question either. “Really? I had no idea about that, then again I would rather eat my caffeine than drink it. It tastes so much better in chocolate form, trust me.” She said with a slight smile, chocolate was an absolute weakness. She was easily distracted when it came to floating a chocolate bar in front of her face as much as a pizza did for others. It was silly really though chocolate was a constant in her life and in far too many places in her house too for it to be good.

“Well as a doctors you’re not going anywhere until you’ve eaten a square meal.” She said knowing that the last thing he needed was to forget to eat. If it was one thing she could do for Kristina now it was to make sure that Martin at least had food in him. Sofia glanced at him for a moment when he asked if she was okay, “Yes I’m okay, just a... you know long day.” She said biting her lip, no unloading on the guy was wrong when he had just found out about his wife.

She chuckled lightly when he picked a piece of chocolate and set it on her desk. Sofia shook her head at the mention of eating; at times he could be a pain in the backside and a smart ass. “No I haven’t which is why you don’t get a choice in eating. You’re eating something, somewhere so you can choose.” She said firmly as she paused for a moment, “It’s on me too, and don’t think I’m letting you go get one of those frozen dinners either. I know what you do.” She tried to put on her best knowing face though it hardly worked it looked more like she was trying to glare and was failing badly.

Sheldon Martin,

[Sheldon Martin]

With all due respect

Aren't you going to reciprocate?

Do I always have to talk sense into people?

TAGS || Dr Sofia Austin

[attr="class","nthlftsybdytxt1"]Sofia was right, that wasn't him. Martin was the calm level headed person that tried to sort things out. Tried to make them better, he could get his point across without yelling. He wasn't always a man of words either, but he followed through with what he said. But he was hardly going to burn someone as much as the anger inside him wanted to do.

Martin preferred to drink is caffeine in coffee form. Maybe it was just a habit when he had to keep up with a woman who was barely 30, and her vivacious personality. Yeah that could probably explain his caffeine habit. The man was diligent and didn't tend to do things in much a brash manner. Though he was trying to negotiate with a doctor... that always ended well. He skipped what she said about him eating as he could tell she was hiding something.

When he had his hand on the desk setting her chocolate in front of her, he removed his hand but kept his lips near his ear. "Don't hide things Sofia. Long days are excuses." he pointed out. Oh he was calling her on it. "Talk to me, please?" he hated to see friends hurt. He hated it more than anything. Even if he was dealing with his own demons and heart break he hated it when people didn't want to talk because they were afraid it might make him feel worse. It never made him feel worse to help people.

"No. It doesn't work that way. It's on me or I can stand here all day. What do you feel like?" He offered. Though taking a step back he was going to play pain in the butt. If anything the discussion would be a small distraction from the pain he was going through. He was angry, and he wasn't going to take it out on her. So the best he could do was let her distract him. Though it was only partially successful in that, he was already working on trying to bury the pain.

NOTES: NOTES HERE

BOBBI

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[Dr Sofia Austin]

Sofia understood his anger, she had lost a mother and brother to an accident and despite the many times she wanted the person who did it to suffer. There was a point where she knew it simply was anger talking. She however never presumed to say it to him as everyone was different and this was his wife. It was tough to think that Kristina was gone, she almost wanted to check herself but she knew it was true. The friend hardly wanted to believe it yet the doctor knew all too well that things were as they were.

Caffeine was a vitamin, it was one of those life requirements when shifts ran on too long or sleep was ten hours off after already spending twenty awake. Sofia spent most of her day either eating caffeine or drinking the stuff; it was the only way to keep going some days. Hardly what she would prescribe and usually she would be telling people to lay off it but then she understood the need for it. She could hardly get a day in the hospital by without lattes by the dozen or so.

Sofia closed her eyes when he spoke, why did he have to point it out or have to call her out on it. “Long days are long days.” She said though he was right, it was an excuse. Sofia glanced at him before her attention turned to the chocolate bar as she picked it up and took a bite. “My brother left when I was fifteen.” She said knowing that he probably knew the detail behind it. He left her to deal with their father who had landed her in the ER too many times to count, given her numerous days off work with bruises and broken bones.

That brother who she always thought was living a much better life only to find that someone horrid had happened to him and she hardly knew the full story yet. That brother she had been so mad at, so angry with and now seeing him again she had no idea if she was mad, angry, upset, lost or what to say or do about any of it. To explain what her life had been like or to keep quiet and fake the happy smile. “He came back... well came through the ER and I’ve no idea what I feel or want to do about it.” She said omitting the part about crying like a baby on his shoulder.

“Martin know you’re not supposed to argue with a doctor?” She said giving him a look though she hardly wanted to argue with him. “I feel like food of any sort, you pick and I pay. No arguing with me today.” She said with a smile seeing him take a step back; she knew he was going to play a pain in the butt but then if it distracted him it was worth it. “Let me do this for you today and I’ll owe you one?” She offered deciding if outright telling him was going to fail she might as well bargain.

Sheldon Martin ,

[Sheldon Martin]

With all due respect

Aren't you going to reciprocate?

Do I always have to talk sense into people?

TAGS || Dr Sofia Austin

[attr="class","nthlftsybdytxt1"]Martin's friendship with Sofia was close enough that he felt comfortable talking to her about many things. He had his children to look out for but he couldn't stand on his own at this point. Even though he put up that front. On top of that Vanessa was expecting, so work had become more stressful than usual. Jackson was upset with him and Teresa wanted to be left alone. Trying to talk to her had been met with a slap to the face. His children were hurting too and that wasn't helping.

Right now Martin wanted a distraction. Anything that didn't remind him of things right now. He needed space, his children needed space and clarity wasn't easy right now. "JJ and Teresa need space; but it's my responsibility to make sure they get through this." He hardly blamed Teresa for slapping him and blaming him. Someone had to be able to stand strong in the face of what his family was going through.

Martin had never been a fan of Sophia's father. He knew some of the story but not everything. Martin put a hand on her back and tugged her towards him. It was so he could look her in the eyes. "It takes time, but if you need to pick up the phone. You know how to reach me" he lifted her chin up. "You are stronger than you realize" he added as he dropped his finger from her chin to just hug his friend. He was allowed to build her up.

Then she went on about arguing with a doctor. "Maybe I just like winding this particular doctor up, it's fun." He was of course likely going to have to duck but he hardly cared. If he could get a smile out of her it was worth it. As for him, he was distracted for the moment. “I think you have that backwards. I'll owe you a dinner." He gave her look. He was the straight lace tell it like it was type. She wasn't getting off that easy. He held out a hand. "I am not picky. So choose something you feel like. I always find something on the menu." Kristina had been the pickiest eater so Martin was used to things a certain way and him picking some place just didn't feel right. "It's easier if you choose" he didn't explain but the distance in his eyes suggested something was there.

NOTES: NOTES HERE

BOBBI

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[Dr Sofia Austin]

Sofia had spoken with him over the time they had known each other about a lot. Not everything but they were good friends and he had this way of making her feel at ease around him enough to just simply talk. She knew he had a front to put up but with her there was no use in it, she was hardly going to judge him or tell him what to do other than eat something. She was hardly sure what was happening in her own life, so far her father was in jail because he had managed to get a cop to shoot her and now her brother was back in town and he was a mess when he had come through the ER.

Her head was all over the place which was why she had thrown herself head first into work because that was that one thing she knew how to do. “Martin, you can’t take care of them if you are not in a state to take care of you.” She said knowing that it was never going to be easy but she had seen her family torn to pieces over the death of her mother. “I know you can do this but they need their father as much as you need them. You just have to take a step back before you can be there yourself.” She said not wanting him to completely step away as she knew how that went too.

Sofia smiled feeling then hand on her back as he tugged her toward him. She stared into his eyes for a moment before she nodded feeling a little foolish for not calling sooner but he had his own things to worry about. She hardly wanted to add to his stress as she gazed at him for a moment. “I know I guess I just...” Well she was hardly sure what she was just but then it was life. “It works both ways you know, you need to pick up the phone you know how to reach me too. Anything at all any time.” She offered as she smiled and shook her head lightly as he hugged her. “Thanks for the vote of confidence but I guess we’ll see.” She said as she hugged him honestly how he thought that of her she was unsure as she felt like breaking into a thousand pieces already.

Sofia lightly swatted him on the arm when she said he liked winding this doctor up. She could hardly keep the smile from her face as he had a way of doing that, making her smile when he was just being himself. “Maybe this doctor won’t take it so well.” She teased though honestly she enjoyed it because it got her out of her own head. Sofia rolled her eyes lightly at his straight laced answer. “Fine then you owe me a dinner.” She said smiling though she was hardly letting him get the bill that day at all.

She took his hand and nodded, she knew Kristina had been a picky eater though when he said it was easier for her to choose there was something in his eyes that said it would be. “What about Italian?” She asked deciding to just choose for his sake as she squeezed his hand lightly. “That way there’s lots of choices unless you’re the sort that goes to an Italian and orders an omelette?” She asked smiling as she nudged him lightly.

Sheldon Martin ,

[Sheldon Martin]

With all due respect

Aren't you going to reciprocate?

Do I always have to talk sense into people?

TAGS || Dr Sofia Austin

[attr="class","nthlftsybdytxt1"]Martin wasn't even sure where he put his head most days. It was hardly easy to find it now. He still had to get back and talk to Jackson and Teresa. Teresa hardly wanted to be around things right now. Martin understood but that was hard to grasp his head around.

Martin knew Sofia was right but he wasn't sure when he was going to be in any state to look out for himself. Right now all that mattered was his children. He just listened to her talk. He pulled her into a hug. Martin was not used to being alone. His kids were grown, it wasn't like he was a single father raising two little ones but in a way it felt like it. In the back of his head, they were still little and still needed protection but then again so many fathers saw their kids in such a way.

Taking his hand he brushed some of her hair from her face. "It's going to be okay." He had always felt protective over her, knowing what he knew about her father. He was just that type of person. The way he'd treated Sofia did not fly with him. He knew that things weren't easy for her right now. But he knew deep down she cared about her brother. He just listened as she spoke. Martin was more of a listener than a talker. He ran a hand along her back. "Don't sell yourself short." He reminded her.

Smirking when she swatted at him he couldn't hide his amusement. He didn't swat back but he lightly tickled her side. "Mhmm that's why she's smiling." He mused out. Then cue her eye roll over him getting dinner. "Italian it is and yes. I owe you dinner later." He informed her as he felt her nudging him. When she said omelette he shook his head. "That's breakfast." Martin was a very compartamentalized person. One who did not do breakfast for dinner.

NOTES: NOTES HERE

BOBBI

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[Dr Sofia Austin]

There were days when she hated to be right about something and today was one of those days. Seeing the strongest person she knew in the world not know what way was up was heart breaking as she hugged him. She wished there was more she could do for him to at least take the pain away or tell him what to say to his children but they were adults now. Not five or six they were grown adults and if she knew anything about adults they all dealt with things different and not always in the best ways.

Sofia had little idea what it was like to have children though she saw the bond between them and the parents in the emergency room all the time. To her it was that thing she could look in on but not truly understand. “I should be the one telling you that, Martin.” She said knowing he was protective of her and she was okay with that. Having that one person listen to her meant a lot as she smiled and shrugged when she felt his hand along her back. “I’m trying not to... I just don’t know how to even begin.” She explained.

There was so much to tell her brother, so much to hide from him and so much she had to say where she had no idea where to start. She was still trying to work out that he was back in Chicago, she checked his chart at least three times a day just to make sure she had been entirely awake when it happened. Sure she had dreamed a few things on and off over the years but then she wanted to know what was going on and why it was now he had chosen to come back into her life.

Sofia chuckled when he lightly ticked her side. “I’m not smiling.” She said trying to put on her best effort at a stern face though it never really happened. “See not that difficult to accept dinner.” She said with a smile as she frowned at his comment about breakfast. Sofia struggled to find a plan for meals with the hours she worked, breakfast became dinner and dinner became breakfast more often than she wanted to admit. “Food is food, breakfast, lunch or dinner. Besides it’s nice to have cereal for dinner from time to time and pizza for breakfast.” She said grinning as she knew what Kristina had told her about his eating habits.

Sheldon Martin,